Screwed up again + September musings

All it took, apparently, was just a minor screw-up in this major event called “life” to totally upset my body clock.

Now, despite the inconveniences it brings along with it (again), it has provided some insight into my past lifestyle. I must have been damn bloody screwed up to be an almost complete nocturnal creature in the past many years. It’s so many, I lost count.

Believe me, I am knee-deep in work — paying freelance work and charity work for *ahem* nevermind — and I am tired. But damn, I just can’t fall asleep no matter what.

But God, I have to admit I love being up late with no one around, just to listen to late night radio and write. If there was ever a simple luxury that I had, it would be this. There is almost no money involved in this. That is, if you exclude the electricity used to power my radio, lights, fan and laptop.

I was tossing around in bed just now, and it just hit me. My mom’s been gone for more than four years now. She would have been 45 on 4th September 2008. How time flies.

My brother was a non-pimply kid sitting on the stairs munching on plain white bread when my mom was pronounced dead and wheeled out of our old Tampines home. Now he’s a pimply teenager who’s probably wanking off on a daily basis. (Don’t kill me if you read this. But you know it’s probably true.)

And me?

I met someone so close to being fantastic that I tattooed his name on me a month after we met.

Image Hosted by I’ve not seen my tummy like that for eons.)

Then he turned into a bastard and broke up with me, only to slyly sidle back with me again a week later.

I practically begged him to marry me, and then laid an egg for him.

05-06-07_Josh in mum's arms

(Oh man. I miss tiny little babies who have gummy smiles and can’t do shit except lay there, gurgle and spit up milk all day.)

That egg is now a 15 months old hatchling who likes pretty girls a bit too much and gets overzealous in close proximity of playgrounds.

RIMG0069-fionana & joshie
(Damn that super happy cheekopek grin. I gave birth to a tiny perv!)

So much drama in four years.*sigh* Tell me how is it remotely possible for me not to feel old?

But I bet my mom would have loved Joshua to bits.

And I know I would have loved to have met him before my mom had passed. He would have been such a strong pillar of support for me through that time (instead of that asshole who cheated on me with his ex on the day my mother died). Although I must also add, he would also probably have given my mom a heart attack with his multiple piercings, killer looks (as in look like a murderer, not that he is super handsome) and 90% of him resembling a good-for-nothing chubby chao Ah Beng. Even my dad had thought he was an uneducated Ah Beng who only knew how to spout Hokkien. 😆 In my dad’s words: “Which part of him look like Uni grad huh?!” But in reality, this crude behaving man is one of the smartest (and sweetest) I have encountered, thus the total smitten-ness with him back then.

Sometimes I feel that he’s only here because I had asked my mom to bless me with a good man who would take good care of me. And *poof* this tubby teddy-bear popped out in the most unlikely situation, and we’ve been (sorta) together ever since.

This month also marks the month that we first met, and we’ve been together for four years already. Woohoo! That’s on par than his last relationship, and I am beaming with pride. Ho ho. Now we just have to last another 2 years and it’ll beat my longest relationship with someone. Hur hur.

Yes, I am childish that way. :mrgreen: Sue me.

And my dearest Uncle Henry would probably cringe and flip when he reads this. Have you yet? If not, let me tell you: It’s 4.50am now as I am writing this. You might want to call and scream at me soon. I totally failed making that risotto yesternite. Joshua was “giving face” when he finished half a bowl of that sticky gooey mess that was supposed to be “risotto”. And so totally beamed when I offered him some berry jelly after that yucky dinner. Hur hur.

Ok. End of time-wasting blabbing. Let me go and try to sleep. Again.


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