After sharing the photos from Batam – some of which I pretty much look like a pregnant hippo wearing a bikini – it shocked me that no one else seems to see the utter fatness that is lurking beneath (and all around) the baby bump.
At first I believed everyone was just being nice. After all, hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, and much worse if she is in hormonal overdrive from pregnancy.
But after a while, I realised: No one’s obliged to be nice to me. So why do I think they have any reason to self-censor, especially when one can get away with saying anything under a pseudonym?
I’ve finally understood that my worse enemy is myself.
My issues with my stupid slow-growing hair. My “why-the-hell-is-my-bump-so-huge-at-22-weeks”. My “OMG-see-my-thunder-thighs-and-arms”. And a whole flurry of other self-image issues that seem to grow hand in hand with this pregnancy.
I have no idea why, but since around 10 weeks of pregnancy, I had been squeezing my thighs to show Hubs how much cellulite there actually is. To which he would always say, “Darling, you’re pregnant.”
Yah, but pregnant is no excuse for being fat, crazy-haired, yellow-faced and cellulite-covered, right?!
I think I may be way too brainwashed by images of gorgeous Hollywood pregnant moms. Time to snap back to reality that this is pretty much the way I’ll look – pregnant or otherwise.
At least I’ll have another beautiful baby in 4 months’ time! Let’s countdown! 😀