After dredging through two weeks of running fort pretty much on my own – with more solo winging to come – I’ve about had it.
Weekends feel like weekdays and everyday feels like the same droning cycle repeating itself. And it really doesn’t help that Joshua keeps asking for his Dad and fusses about why Daddy isn’t home.
Even the neighbours commented on how he looks “spaced out” instead of his usual chirpy self.
Despite my best efforts to entertain him by bringing him out, he never seems to forget the fact that Daddy isn’t around most of the time. I guess we both feel somewhat neglected by this ridiculous influx of work that Daddy has to suck up.
And as much as we try to accommodate to this new Daddy-less schedule, it doesn’t change the fact that something is lacking. The fact that he isn’t home, and home is just not complete without him. At least we used to have him over the weekends.
This right now sucks monkey balls.
With the pregnancy crossing over into the 3rd trimester, I am feeling more tired than ever, and I have to cope with a request I cannot fulfill: For Daddy to be home.
I am emotionally drained, and there’s nothing anyone can do about it. None of them are Daddy, and Joshua isn’t stupid enough to be distracted from that. Part of me just wants to scream at Hubs, but like that’s gonna achieve anything.
The best part of it all is, there is no such thing as OT pay in the Ad World. So we can’t even console ourselves with a salary increase fitting of these insane working hours.
I am feeling neglected in more ways than one. And I fear I may burn out very soon.
Once again, it is reaffirmed that I would probably never cut it as a single mom. I don’t give a rat’s ass how other wonder women do it. I’m not them, and I certainly didn’t sign up for this when we decided to get pregnant again. Talk about Murphy’s Law.