Why every mother should have a daughter

Before I had Lisa, I was constantly asked why did I have two boys and not a single daughter. First off, that question is a bit dumb, considering that a child’s gender is hardly decided by the push of a button. Secondly, I never felt any sort of “lack” from not having a mini-me. Sure, it’s cute and fun to dress up little girls, but considering how whiney most of them are, it kinda throws me off my boat just thinking about having them. Boys, on the other hand, with their (mostly) boisterous rough and tumble attitude are generally easier to care for – both financially and psychologically. That said, it definitely irks me when the boys mumble. -_- C’mon, you’re a man, SPEAK UP!

When Lisa arrived, I did not feel any difference towards her as I did to her brothers when they were newly born. She looked… androgynous (like almost all babies) and behaved no different than the boys did as they wailed to breastfeed and wailed to get changed, etc etc. Then… something magical happened.

She grew into this tiny little walking, talking baby doll that looked so much like me when I was her age. She adored all things pink, and would pick up any toy that was girl-specific. She would play with her hair, and asked for me to fiddle around with whatever little she had growing on her head. She giggled and grabbed at all things shiny, pretty or Hello Kitty. One of her first words were “Kitty” in fact, right after “papa”, “mommy”, “gorgor” and “eat”. She was so ultimately girly that it was hard not to bond with her.

She also shows great cognition at a terribly young age. Understanding concepts and emotions that the boys weren’t able to. Just the other day, Keegan received a scolding and started to cry. She rushed off to grab a tissue and wiped his tears, telling him: “二哥, don’t naughty ok? Mommy love you, right?”
She gave me a dirty look, as though I did something bad. Then, she reassured that her brother was loved: “二哥 be good boy k? Come, Lisa hug hug. I love you.”

The tenderness she displays towards everyone just melts my heart. And at barely 2.5 years old, she would often ask: “Mommy, are you soooo tired? Go, lie down. Lisa (can) play (by herself).” 

This little girl just loves and loves, and tickles my socks off whenever she helps “take charge” on my behalf. She would clap her hands to get the boys’ attention, yelling instructions like “Booooys! 来! Dinner time now!” or “Oh my god, so messy!! Booooys! PACK UP NOW!”

How could any mother not possibly love a child like that? 🙂

Now, I am unsure if all girls are as adorable and sensible as this, but it must be a gender difference since I raised all my kids the same way and none of the boys were ever as sensible and loving as this.

As for myself, I’ve seen a surge in patience and love as a mother that I never seemed to have achieved before. Despite her illnesses, vomiting in the middle of the night, and dramatised “OH MY GOD MOMMY, MY NAIL POLISH SPOIL”, I find that I hardly get irritated with her. (Maybe this is favoritism, I cannot be sure.)

I only know I enjoy any time I get with her, and cannot get enough of her antics and requests. Despite the countless times she asks me to tie up or blow dry her hair, or how many times she would try on shoes at the stores, or how she would go through several outfit changes a day… Well, you get my drift. 🙂




I had an enjoyable weekend getaway with the bestie, where we ate and shopped. (She shopped a lot more.)

But unfortunately I came down with some bug that has induced a cough and funny nose, So the husband made 鸡丝鲍贝粥 for me while I vegetated and spent time with the kids. Then I slept 12 hours straight from 7pm to 7am. 😆

After sending the boys off to school, I slept another 4 hours.

And then after noticing how much dust had collected on the floors over the weekend, I asked Josh if I should be cleaning house. He said: “But you’re not feeling well! Maybe tomorrow lah.”

Life is so kind to me.

Self serviced!

I can’t believe that my 33-month-old just executed a “big mission” on his own! I heard someone fiddling with a stepping stool, but didn’t think much of it until minutes later, Kee shouted: “I need help to clean! I poop!” Half thinking he had done it in his pants again like last week, I scurried to him only to find him standing outside the bathroom sans pants, his head covered in sweat. The child seat was on the toilet, with a stepping stool in front of it.

Proudly he announced with a grin: “See! All my poop inside the toilet!  See korkor, Kee Kee so clever now!” 

Oh yes, you’re clever alright. And you’re faring better than your brother did at this age!  I’m atrociously amazed that at 33 months, he had setup everything on his own and had a poop without anyone’s help – until he needed his bum cleaned anyway.

I wonder how old he’d be when he can clean his own ass… That’ll really be the day to really celebrate 100% toilet trained independence!

Mama’s Pride and Joy

It has been a triumphant day for me as a mother! Despite my pregnancy ailments, I actually managed to make a dinner of nuggets and fries, and bake a batch of butter cookies on just three hours of sleep.

Granted, I would have skipped making the cookies because my lower legs are swollen so badly and the lower abdomen cramps kept coming all day long from Lisa’s (seemingly) nonstop growth spurts. But Josh is home no thanks to HFMD and he had wanted to spend some “quality time” together by going out. Given that we’ve already splashed out $160 at the doctor’s just over the past week – 1 inner ear inflammation and 2 cases of HFMD – I had to honestly tell Josh that we’re cash-strapped and there was nothing we could do even if we went out. Fortunately it wasn’t something hard for him to understand, so he suggested we make cookies “together” instead. (However he ended up mostly watching because he claimed it was such hard work.)

There were several highlights today that made me feel extremely blessed:

  • When Kee woke up in the morning with a 100% dry diaper, smiled when I helped him brush his molars, went to pee in the potty urinal, and headed off to school sans diaper. And he said “I love you mommy. Bye!!” as the auntie helped him onto the school bus.
  • When Josh was presented with 3 egg tarts for breakfast, and he gave the brightest cheeriest grin while saying: “Mommy, I love you so much! Thank you!” 
  • When I wiped down the dining table and Josh said: “I like you mommy. Thank you for cleaning the table. You’re so nice, I want to give you a present.” It’s nice that he notices the little things I do, and how it all comes together to make our home more humane. 🙂
  • When I read Kee’s communication book on how his first diaper-free schoolday went, and his teacher expressed that their anxiousness was unfounded as Kee was able to express himself with ample time to be accident-free. They did, however, make him wear a diaper for naptime because they are still cautious about his bladder abilities. I’ve replied to them via the comm book that it should not be cause for concern at all since he has been napping at home the whole week (for at least 2 hrs each time) without a single accident.
  • When the boys did a happy dance and yelped as the butter cookies came out of the oven, saying: “Wow mommy! You’re so good!”
  • When Kee exclaimed he was having “stomach pain” and ended up with a successful poop in the toilet! He did his first one on Sunday evening and if all goes well, it should become a daily habit. 🙂
  • When I thought Kee was trying to be irritating when Josh was pooping, but in actual fact he was trying to brush his own teeth in preparation for bedtime! He started whining because he still can’t squeeze the toothpaste out onto his toothbrush. This little guy has a pretty amazing mind, because we didn’t even tell him to go brush his teeth yet! Josh usually brushes first, but I guess he figured since Josh was pooping, he might as well go first. 🙂
  • When I walked in on Josh reading a bedtime story to Kee. Both of them were seated on Josh’s bed, and smart Josh had picked the book with the least words “My beak, your beak”. When I praised Josh for the nice act, he said: “Because you are so tired and your legs are so swollen and fat, so I read for didi lor.” *sigh* I simply couldn’t not read to them after hearing that.

Thank you God, for blessing my day with so much maternal joy. These 2 boys are so lovely at times, it almost feels like a privilege to be their mother. On other days… oh well, let’s not talk about those today. :p


Recap from 22 May 2010:

Sometimes I wonder if my life will ever change.
If we will ever move out of this flat. – CHECK
If we will ever have more children. – CHECK (Female bun in oven as I type.)
If we will ever have more money and other resources to have more children. – CHECK (Just have to get my priorities right.)
If we will ever go for a decent holiday that involves flying off in an airplane. – CHECK. BKK 3D2N in May 2011.
If we will ever have a car. – NOPE. Sibei expensive sia. (God please give us a free car if we so deserve it.)
If we will ever have a weekend away from the kids. – CHECK. Batam 3D2N in Nov 2011.
If we will ever be richer at all. – CHECK (Don’t mind being even richer though.)
If I will ever get a piano. – Not yet. Hopefully soon if I manage to clear more space in my tiny office.
If I will ever get LASIK done. – CHECK. Done in Aug 2011.
If my stomach will ever be washboard flat (though it never was from the moment I was born). – NOPE. Pregnant now, can’t be flat anyway.
If I will ever eat at Morton’s. (Don’t talk to me about overrated, I can’t judge cos I haven’t tried.) – NOPE. But Privé is pretty good too.
If I will ever get out of these four walls. – CHECK. 
If I will ever make a mark in life. – Eh… debatable. 
If I will ever grow up and stop wondering about stuff. – Probably never. :p 

Eh, all in all not bad leh! All within the span of 2 years! My husband really is something, man. God is good. 🙂
I found a good reason to keep blogging, if only for my own selfish reflection and revisiting.

Almost 7.

Maybe I was never shown nor taught the right thing from a young age, but now that I have almost everything it suddenly becomes clear what is priceless.

Not the diamond ring I never got.
Not the lavish wedding reception we didn’t have.
Not the gifts you couldn’t afford to get.

What I now find invaluable and precious would have made me scoff at its insignificance years ago:

How you force your eyes open despite tiredness to give me a massage.
How you voluntarily take on more than you should just to make sure I live comfortably.
How you tell me that loving me is your privilege when I mostly feel nothing more than a leech growing little leeches within me.

I only wish for you to know how wonderful you have been to me, and how privileged I am to have you.

While I used to like change so that things will always stay fresh and exciting, you have been the one constant in my life – never forsaking me. And you are the one constant that I wish to always have in my life.

I love you.

This home.

not because of what it has
but who lives
in it

not because of how we have
but how life will be
designed here

A sanctuary
where we do not sweat the small stuff
yet appreciate all little things
in joyful spirit

This home
where we will love
and we will live
blissfully ever after

Thank you Lord
for the love
wisdom and everything
bestowed upon us


15 hours.

We talked. We walked. My be(a)stie and I. We made up more than ever with 15 hours of nonstop talking, heart-to-heart, tears and laughter.

I am fulfilled.
My life is fulfilled.
I can die today because I have everything a woman should ever have in her life.

A wonderful husband.
A comrade who sings the same tune.
Beautiful children who are generally well-behaved.
A loving eccentric uncle who is my surrogate mother.
A brother who is finally learning to walk the right path, and credited me for it.
A wonderful helper who is more than anyone could ask for.

I am fulfilled.
I am filled with joy and bliss.

And to whoever is reading this, I wish you the same joy and bliss and fulfillment that a human should ever know.

The world is good. I am good. Life is good.

This is such a simple message from me, but I am feeling such strong emotions that my heart is BURSTING with pure contentment.
Please, find this same contentment (and more) for yourself, for those who love you and you love. And make your world good, your life good.

I, am complete.


Diary: Bangkok Day 1

After over 2 years, I am finally getting to write another “Great Getaways” post! Haiz. The life of a lower middle class mom. 😆

[Pictures will be uploaded later when we get home in slightly more comprehensive posts. It’s too much effort for someone who is still on holiday. Though I do need to jot down everyday before I forget. My memory lasts almost as long as a goldfish, which isn’t very long at all. LOL.]

So, in point form, here goes:

  • Despite dropping 2-3 dress sizes (from US 14 to US 8/10) I am still a tad too meaty for BKK free size clothing. Although I am wearing extremely cheap 3 for 100 baht (S$4) racerback tanks now in prep for bedtime, it’s not exactly something I would wear out to town. I can see all my flabs sticking out in all the wrong places!!
  • Siam Ocean World was DA BOMB even though tickets costed 1,000 baht (approx S$40) per adult and 800 baht per kid – includes entry, glass bottom boat ride, fishy foot spa, popcorn and Pepsi. It’s probably about double the size of Sentosa Underwater World, with a lot more to see and do. I already have intentions to come back again, with or without the kids. :mrgreen:

    There’s this gorgeous display sponsored by Bang & Olufsen with jellyfish “dancing” to classical music played through fab quality speakers (duh). I swear I could sit there all day just being soothed by the lights, music and jellyfish movement.

  • Josh rode on a Tuk Tuk and claims he is able to drive one now. Only complaint: “I think it’s a bit dangerous and scary.”

All in all, Day One went well. Everyone had fun, money was spent (cheaply), and weather was good. The plane ride itself was the climax of the day for Josh! Having visited Siam Ocean World made it doubly good for him.

We’re still contemplating if we should be visiting the floating market or an elephant park tomorrow. Will have to call the hotel concierge to see if they are able to arrange anything for us. Less hassle. Heh. :p

Independent children.

See, the thing about having independent children is that they’re so comfortable in their element that they indirectly force me to surrender my rights to mollycoddling them at times.

I actually enjoy inviting the boys to my room for naps, so that I may hold their hands while they sleep or simply stare at their cherubic faces. This is even more true for Keegan – him being at such an irresistible “part baby part child” stage. Yet alas, he had never agreed to a sleepover, choosing to simply declare: “Go bed bed!” as a way of telling me he has his own spot in the house. “I have my own bed, you know? And I like it very much, thank you.” he seems to say.

God must have heard my prayers of wanting to hold on to that little last sliver of Kee’s babyhood, because the first sleepover finally happened.

Isn’t he gorgeous? 🙂